Hello again, dropping in for a second update since my cancer diagnosis.

The #1 question I get asked… “How do you feel?”

March started with another dose of chemotherapy at Fred Hutch. I decided to have fun with my head wraps and color-coordinate the visit with my newly bald head, down to the water bottle!

This month, certain symptoms have started to present themselves.

These include restlessness, sleepless nights, frustrated legs, a sort of abdominal discomfort as if I’ve done too many ab crunches, and an aversion to fresh salads and tomatoes, which I normally love. During chemo days, I’m more a fan of cooked vegetables and rice instead. There is also complete hair loss, I mean everywhere! And in the 7 to 10 days following chemotherapy, I experience a complete lack of focus and tiredness, again almost like an extreme hangover.

On the plus side, the restlessness causes huge creative spikes where I’ll do an art project all day, the hours slipping by as I paint or mosaic tile. It has also caused sort of a ‘nesting’ where I want my environment clean, but I want to showcase something creative.

The baldness sets in…

I remember the day, hour, and moment my hair fell out. My oncologist made me laugh; he said my hair made it a “group effort”. He is correct. I was sitting reading my book, Circe, that Jonathan got me for Christmas. If you get a chance, read it! It’s about a Greek Goddess who is an herbal witch. It’s a best seller and a page turner! Anyway… I play with my hair when I read. I ran my fingers through my bangs, and when I pulled my hand back in front of my face, all of my bangs were in my hand! “Oh shit!” I yelled and jumped up to run to a mirror in the bathroom. I picked up a nice chunk off the side of my head and gently pulled, and yeap… it all released into my fingers.

The next morning, I decided it was time to shave it. I woke up early and waited for Julian to wake up. I had his clippers ready on the counter. “Good morning,” he said. “We are shaving my head,” I said. “No, you don’t have to,” he said. “Yes, I do! I can’t have my hair falling out in chunks like this! I’m going to look like the witch from Stardust! Do you remember the witch Michelle Pfeifer played?!!!” I yelled. “Okay, okay, let me wake up, it’s okay.” Poor, sleepy Jules said.

We stood in the shower, and Julian shaved my head. After that buzz cut, my hair continued to fall out, and now I’m mostly skin. With that cell death and hair loss came a little more tiredness.

I’m not a fan of wigs so far. They don’t ’look’ like me. So far, I prefer turbans, beanies, and just being bald! Julian and I had fun with a wig I got; it looked better on him!

Learnings from my care team. How did the cancer get in?

During the month, I investigated new methods of treatment that would complement my chemotherapy. Fred Hutch offers Eastern meets Western medicine with an Integrative Medicine doctor. Self-care and wellness practices are something I truly believe in. My insurance covered it, and I booked the appointment.

The doctor assigned to me was based on a questionnaire I filled out, asking what my lifestyle was like. I was paired with Dr. Lisa Price, a naturopathic doctor and a scientist who studies mushrooms. In addition to studying turkey tail, reishi, and lion’s mane mushrooms for their mechanisms of action, she has also written nutrition-focused cookbooks for patients living through cancer treatment. During the session, we talked about my low vitamin D levels, how to manage suppressed stress, and what to add to my diet. Dr. Price told me to add more probiotics, she suggested I eat a forkful of sauerkraut everyday, stick to animal based proteins, eat a diet rich in a variety of mushrooms and increase leafy greens like collard greens, kale, and bokchoy. The only animal nutrition she suggested was sipping bone broth once a day.

https://www.fredhutch.org/en/provider-directory/lisa-price.html

Another culprit for my cancer might have been my extremely low levels of Vitamin D. My general practitioner had been trying for years to get my levels up, which were in the single digits for years. Vitamin D plays a role in regulating cell growth, differentiation, and apoptosis (programmed cell death). A deficiency might disrupt these processes, potentially leading to uncontrolled cell growth and cancer development.

Getting Vitamin D from food sources is actually hard, and getting Vitamin D from only the sun doesn’t work either. The doctor asked me if I went outside. To which I can proudly say that I do, for over an hour a day, walk my 2 crazy dogs. I love reading on the patio and doing crafts outside. Even if it rains. Granted, I live in the Seattle area, and it’s overcast, but that actually isn’t the issue. Julian, who lives in the same place, has great Vitamin D levels. It’s the way my body metabolizes it.

Part of my care is taking a double dose of an extra strength Vitamin D Supplement.

Something we also talked about was cancer getting in from suppressed stress. I can identify with this. I do consider myself a “doer” and can often take on a lot or am looked to as a leader to solve big challenges. In the face of a challenge, I’m not stressed. I think that’s why I can take them on and solve it. I don’t “seem” stressed, and I actually don’t even feel it at the moment. But it’s what I do with that energy before and afterward that matters. Instead of saving yoga and meditation for the weekend, she recommended I start and end my day with it.

Kathleen, my sister who specializes in wellness practices and has her own business in Connecticut called Grow Wellness (https://www.growwellnesstherapy.com), came to visit this month for a week, right after my visit with Dr. Price. It was PERFECT timing. Every day, Kathleen worked on me with Reiki, visualization meditations, and a very light therapeutic massage, teaching me how and where to put my thoughts and stress.

Support from family and friends this month

Words can’t express what my family and friends have meant to me during this time. I have had a revolving door of visitors, and my phone is constantly chiming with new messages from my colleagues, family, and friends from afar. Each brings their love, help, and their own “way” of caring for not only me but Julian and the kids, too.

The month started with my mother and father-in-law going back to Georgia. What a time we had. They seriously helped set us up for success. They went shopping and built a patio for me! They reorganized cabinets and closets and did laundry galore! I love you guys!

Then, without missing a beat, one of my best friends, Brad Shinn, whom I’ve known since I was 15, came for one night! He said he just ” had to see me”. It was a day I had great energy, and we went on a 2-mile hike together. When there was a small break in the family, my beautiful neighbors, the Ross family, surprised us with a catered pot roast dinner that lasted us days! Thank you, Taryn Ross! I LOVE YOU! Then… my sister Kathleen arrived! And steady through it all had been Dad and Erica, taking me to appointments, cleaning the kitchen, getting meals, and making me laugh hysterically.

I am truly blessed to have a schedule of family and friends coming in to literally take care of us.

Fighting cancer with the FIERCE recipe

When I told the people I work with at Agilent that I would be taking some time off to fight cancer, I made the connection that I would channel my ‘inner Wonderwoman. ‘ I LOVE the re-invention of Wonder Woman with Gal Gadot! And since that re-launch, I have collected posters, dolls, and other Wonder-woman memorabilia. Instead of thinking I have to fight, the word FIERCE keeps repeating over and over in my head for some reason. The definition of Fierce is having or displaying an intense or ferocious aggressiveness. And since this cancer is called Aggressive B Cell Lymphoma, I am going to go at it with Fierce aggressiveness right BACK!

The word FIERCE is my recipe for how I am fighting cancer.

F = Family and Friends

I = Isolation in Issaquah

E = Energy from movement, nutrition, and nature

R = Rest and relaxation

C = Chemotherapy

E = Environment

So picture me, bald with a cape on, in my Issaquah forest, channeling all that I possibly can to regrow healthy cells to become whole and me again.